King Charles III Watch

[Celtient]

Scousers pay tax?

[Currywurst and Chips]

The scousers loudly booed the National anthem yesterday. Why not? We pay taxes that pay for this family. They do nothing for the working class

Exactly, that’s the reason why I publicly boo anyone without a job who relies on the taxpayer in the street.

Especially since Jeremy Kyle got shut down and removed the middle man

[CEB]

Succession plan? Er, isn't that already sorted?

My guess is that if the outlook wasn’t very, very bad, we wouldn’t know about it at all. I reckon we’ll have another king by christmas

[Dunners]

Something's definitely up.

Will has just pulled out of a memorial service at Windsor for "personal reasons". Kate has been in hospital for "abdominal reasons" for several weeks now. Charles has turbo cancer.

I get that they want their privacy but, seeing as I'm paying for the buggers, I expect them to dance for me. Come on Witchell, time to earn your ages.

[Long slender neck]

Probably just this https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-68413546

[Dunners]

Possibly. But I've been down the rabbit hole that is Kate Middleton Conspiracy Twitter, and it's wild. I'm now fully invested.

[Rich Tea Wellin]

What is the conspiracy? She’s getting lizards pulled out of her left and right?

[Dunners]

Yes. That's actually one of them.

The starting point is that she has not been seen publicly for two months, there's no clarity on just what the medical issue is that she's supposedly been treated for, the the silence from the media is deafening. You would usually expect the tabloid hacks to be going crazy over this, but for some reason they're all acting disinterested. To be fair to Nutjob Twitter, all of that is fair enough.

But then you start to read all the various theories as to what has happened to Kate, and it's brilliant. From giving birth to lizards, getting a Brazilian butt-lift, through to being in a coma following William nutting her.

[Dunners]

For example:

[The Mindsweep]

Yes. That's actually one of them.

The starting point is that she has not been seen publicly for two months, there's no clarity on just what the medical issue is that she's supposedly been treated for, the the silence from the media is deafening. You would usually expect the tabloid hacks to be going crazy over this, but for some reason they're all acting disinterested. To be fair to Nutjob Twitter, all of that is fair enough.

But then you start to read all the various theories as to what has happened to Kate, and it's brilliant. From giving birth to lizards, getting a Brazilian butt-lift, through to being in a coma following William nutting her.

I'm told that she is refusing to be seen in public until William stops demanding to be pegged

[Dunners]

I've read that one too.

[Dunners]

Some other theories include:

- secret baby (ginger or lizard)
- game of hide & seek got out of hand
- self-immolated 4 Palestine
- transitioning
- joined ISIS
- attempted suicide
- secret contestant on Celebrity Big Brother
- got stabbed in a no-go area (Brick Lane, not where you're all thinking)
- has been murdered and Buckingham Palace desperately trying to find a doppelganger
- BBL

[Dunners]

Probably just this https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-68413546

(I'm totally involved in this now)

Having given this far too much thought, I don't think that is it. That would be a perfectly reasonable reason to cite for him missing the memorial service, so surely they would have just said so. The fact that we've just been told "personal reasons" instead makes me think there's much more to this which requires investigation by trawling through the gutter of social media.

[Dunners]

Hmmmm. Makes sense.

[aylesburyos]

Scousers pay tax?

Yes they do & work hard unlike the rich Tory tax dodgers

[Dunners]

Probably just this https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-68413546

The plot thickens.

"...died from a "traumatic head wound" with a gun found near to his body..." Without meaning to speculate, I trust that the gun is to be dusted for Kate's fingerprints.

[Long slender neck]

blew his brains out then?

[Dunners]

Did she? Blimey, Kate's game.

[Hoover Attack]

Hope you've got some evidence to support that, LSN.

[Celtient]

Wouldn't she have a Lady-in-Waiting to take care of that sort of stuff though?

[Dunners]

Further clarification - It would appear that the "traumatic head wound" and the "gun found near to his body" are connected.

[Hoover Attack]

Further clarification - It would appear that the "traumatic head wound" and the "gun found near to his body" are connected.

I’m going to wait for confirmation as to how the bullet entered his head before I jump to any conclusions.

[Yanzi Gravy]

Probably just this https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-68413546

The plot thickens.

"...died from a "traumatic head wound" with a gun found near to his body..." Without meaning to speculate, I trust that the gun is to be dusted for Kate's fingerprints.

Her sister Pippa was his old girlfriend. Why would Kate be involved?

[Celtient]

Think you've just answered your own question there

[CEB]

I’m enjoying all the conspiracy theories around this