Independent Leyton Orient Forum

Posted: **Sun Mar 19, 2023 1:13 pm**

I suppose that having ADHD might partly explain the need to continuously post drivel on this MB. At least you've got an excuse, I suppose.

Posted: **Fri Oct 27, 2023 3:19 pm**

Thought I’d look back on this thread.
Bit of a weird one really - I did what was intended as a short break from alcohol back in the end of June, but just stuck with it and have now been off the booze for nearly four months.
Am getting most of the known benefits of stopping drinking, but interestingly (or not) it’s clear to me that I definitely had/have a tendency to self medicate with alcohol. Not to get pissed, but just that having a glass of wine or a beer would always just numb out distractions or aid with having a sense of proportion - usually if I’m on a rant, it’s stone cold sober, I’m naturally a lot more laid back just with that one beer that can take the edge off a mood or a sense of anxiety. Weird.
Anyway, the replacement is what I’m getting my head round - I think I still have the same predisposition to be argumentative, but while before I could sort of “switch” into a slightly less spiky version after I’d opened a bottle of wine, now I think I (mostly) can now notice when I’m getting into ADHD behaviour - whether it’s procrastinating or getting into a time sink - and usually make an executive decision to do something different.

Interested in whether any of the others who were looking into it got any further?

Posted: **Fri Oct 27, 2023 3:25 pm**

Have you seen a Dr for a diagnosis yet?

Posted: **Fri Oct 27, 2023 3:31 pm**

No, I don’t think I’m going to. I’ve got a few little strategies that mitigate the impact a bit, and the positive changes from exercise and not drinking also help, so I’m doing alright generally I think.
I’ll look into it again in six months, as I’ve got a vague plan of building up my body of illustration work, taking it a bit more seriously etc. if in six months I’m not where I plan to be with it, and it’s because of just straightforward being disorganised, then I might rethink

Posted: **Fri Oct 27, 2023 3:38 pm**

You really should go for a diagnosis. Had a mate who thought he had ADHD, 3 years later was found dead with a massive brain tumour. His wife kept telling him to go & stop self diagnosing. Good luck whatever you decide to do.

Posted: **Fri Oct 27, 2023 3:45 pm**

CEB wrote: ↑Fri Oct 27, 2023 3:19 pm Thought I’d look back on this thread.
Bit of a weird one really - I did what was intended as a short break from alcohol back in the end of June, but just stuck with it and have now been off the booze for nearly four months.
Am getting most of the known benefits of stopping drinking, but interestingly (or not) it’s clear to me that I definitely had/have a tendency to self medicate with alcohol. Not to get pissed, but just that having a glass of wine or a beer would always just numb out distractions or aid with having a sense of proportion - usually if I’m on a rant, it’s stone cold sober, I’m naturally a lot more laid back just with that one beer that can take the edge off a mood or a sense of anxiety. Weird.
Anyway, the replacement is what I’m getting my head round - I think I still have the same predisposition to be argumentative, but while before I could sort of “switch” into a slightly less spiky version after I’d opened a bottle of wine, now I think I (mostly) can now notice when I’m getting into ADHD behaviour - whether it’s procrastinating or getting into a time sink - and usually make an executive decision to do something different.

Interested in whether any of the others who were looking into it got any further?

Fair play on going dry - something I manage for about a month every 3 or 4 months (i.e. Sober January, April, July and November).

I have a observation, and am not sure you've noticed it yourself - but it seems to me you use alcohol (or its use) as a put down on here, when in a debate about something you care about a lot, quite a bit - is the timing coincident? E.G. Hoping someone's hangover is better this morning / having a pop at Max for - well, being Scotch I guess.

I'm not having a pop (geddit?) but if I've noticed it, I wonder whether you have?

No - I've not touched a drop today (yet)

Posted: **Fri Oct 27, 2023 3:52 pm**

The use of digs about being pissed is mostly a - hangover - from the old Libertines message board where there were usernames specifically set up to note when someone was pissed - “Caca-on-the-sauce-notifier”, say, rather than connected to any real issue with someone drinking, and similarly old tropes from here about alco-boarding.

To overly analyse (me?!) the point of such insults is more to ridicule a person who is probably sober, on the basis that they are acting as stupidly as if pissed, more than to identify and ridicule someone for seeming to be drunk. (Exception being those boarders who have historically logged on at 11:30 being belligerent on threads where no one is present, and then you see it in the morning)

Posted: **Fri Oct 27, 2023 3:54 pm**

The Max thing - as I’m sure he’d agree - is mutual button pushing, usually kept within the scope of one or two threads. I definitely expect him to refer to ADHD the next time I take issue with him on something

Posted: **Fri Oct 27, 2023 3:58 pm**

I tend to be at my worst on here (by which I mean posting loads of lengthy posts) when I'm at my most busy and stressed at work. Rather counterintuitively, it helps to distract me and helps to cope with work demands. It's as if by wasting time on here and reducing the time I have left for work, I tend to be more ruthless and focused in how I approach tasks and manage my time. I'm one of those people that hates pressure, and yet that's when I'm at my best.

As for the booze, I try and keep it just to the weekends. And even then, I never get pissed anymore, but will just relax with a few glasses of wine or two or three beers. I hate waking up with even the slightest hint of a hangover. I once went a month without drinking but just realised I was a boring f*cker, so was best knocking any ideas of complete sobriety on the head.

Posted: **Fri Oct 27, 2023 4:00 pm**

Fair dos - although I've personally noticed it more in recent months - hence my question on timing with your sobriety. Of course, I'm aware that may just be heightened sensitivity as I become more aware of my own relationship with the bottle

Posted: **Fri Oct 27, 2023 4:06 pm**

Dunners wrote: ↑Fri Oct 27, 2023 3:58 pm I tend to be at my worst on here (by which I mean posting loads of lengthy posts) when I'm at my most busy and stressed at work. Rather counterintuitively, it helps to distract me and helps to cope with work demands. It's as if by wasting time on here and reducing the time I have left for work, I tend to be more ruthless and focused in how I approach tasks and manage my time. I'm one of those people that hates pressure, and yet that's when I'm at my best.

As for the booze, I try and keep it just to the weekends. And even then, I never get pissed anymore, but will just relax with a few glasses of wine or two or three beers. I hate waking up with even the slightest hint of a hangover. I once went a month without drinking but just realised I was a boring f*cker, so was best knocking any ideas of complete sobriety on the head.

This has articulated something that I’ve definitely done over the years. Almost like using something - whether it’s a message board, playing football manager, whatever - as a way of upping the difficulty level and urgency until a task requires all my focus to do it. I find it almost impossible to do a task unless it’s completely mind numbing, or extremely difficult. And that goes as much for creative stuff as for paid work.

It’s why I gravitated towards where I work directly with people, with stuff that needs doing right then; if a job involves dealing with stuff as it arises, I can be on top of my game indefinitely. Get me to prepare for a performance review though and on the morning of it I’ll be s***ing myself regardlsss

Posted: **Fri Oct 27, 2023 4:10 pm**

StillSpike wrote: ↑Fri Oct 27, 2023 4:00 pm Fair dos - although I've personally noticed it more in recent months - hence my question on timing with your sobriety. Of course, I'm aware that may just be heightened sensitivity as I become more aware of my own relationship with the bottle

It’s definitely possible. Especially as I’ve subtly shifted my internal mindset where the smell of alcohol is now off putting more then enticing, so maybe there’s an element of the annoying reformed drinker/smoker, though I think I’ve mostly got a lid on that.

Related, I’ve always sort of thought that nights out don’t get messy until late on, but I’d say that on nights out this last few months, it’s after the third drink that I start to feel like “ah, and now I’m sober and the others are not”, and start to think of an exit strategy? So maybe there’s something in it

Posted: **Fri Oct 27, 2023 4:14 pm**

It’s the people that do the very middle class/aged thing of saying “I’ve given up ________ and, my god, I’ve got so much energy now”

What are they storing up all this excess energy for….

Posted: **Fri Oct 27, 2023 4:16 pm**

Currywurst and Chips wrote: ↑Fri Oct 27, 2023 4:14 pm It’s the people that do the very middle class/aged thing of saying “I’ve given up ________ and, my god, I’ve got so much energy now”

What are they storing up all this excess energy for….

Generally agree, though to answer the question posed honestly, part of my motivation is that I’m realising that I’m probably (just about) more than half way through my years of playing football, and being a bit fitter so I can play twice a week until I’m maybe 45/46 is something I really want to do

Posted: **Fri Oct 27, 2023 4:19 pm**

Currywurst and Chips wrote: ↑Fri Oct 27, 2023 4:14 pm It’s the people that do the very middle class/aged thing of saying “I’ve given up ________ and, my god, I’ve got so much energy now”

What are they storing up all this excess energy for….

Once safely past middle age (unless, by some vile trick of the Gods, I'm going to live to 120) then you're more likely to be saying "I’ve given up ________ and, my god, I'm don't feel quite as shockingly terrible as I might otherwise"

Posted: **Fri Oct 27, 2023 4:23 pm**

CEB wrote: ↑Fri Oct 27, 2023 4:16 pm
Currywurst and Chips wrote: ↑Fri Oct 27, 2023 4:14 pm It’s the people that do the very middle class/aged thing of saying “I’ve given up ________ and, my god, I’ve got so much energy now”
What are they storing up all this excess energy for….
Generally agree, though to answer the question posed honestly, part of my motivation is that I’m realising that I’m probably (just about) more than half way through my years of playing football, and being a bit fitter so I can play twice a week until I’m maybe 45/46 is something I really want to do

That’s good going

I had to give up my footballing career aged 16 after an unexpected and sudden diagnosis of lack of any talent

Posted: **Fri Oct 27, 2023 5:30 pm**

I didn’t let lack of talent stop me

To be fair, I’m a goalkeeper so it’s not like I’m always running. It’s more the recovery time after games and getting injuries to hands that make it less easy to pursue my hobbies of drawing, playing guitar, having arguments online and masturbating

Posted: **Fri Oct 27, 2023 5:34 pm**

Posted: **Fri Oct 27, 2023 6:11 pm**

Do you have to tell DVLA about an ADHD diagnosis?

Posted: **Fri Oct 27, 2023 6:27 pm**

Haven’t read the thread (but will) but in the last two months basically convinced myself I have it. So many symptoms are scarily relatable and all of a sudden loads of the last 25 years makes sense. Doubt I’ll bother with diagnosis as it seems difficult and the criteria is silly. But there’s an assessment at work I may do to get some adjustments in place

Posted: **Fri Oct 27, 2023 11:00 pm**

Joe315 wrote: ↑Fri Oct 27, 2023 3:38 pm You really should go for a diagnosis. Had a mate who thought he had ADHD, 3 years later was found dead with a massive brain tumour. His wife kept telling him to go & stop self diagnosing. Good luck whatever you decide to do.

Wtf!?

Posted: **Fri Oct 27, 2023 11:05 pm**

CEB wrote: ↑Fri Oct 27, 2023 3:19 pm Thought I’d look back on this thread.
Bit of a weird one really - I did what was intended as a short break from alcohol back in the end of June, but just stuck with it and have now been off the booze for nearly four months.
Am getting most of the known benefits of stopping drinking, but interestingly (or not) it’s clear to me that I definitely had/have a tendency to self medicate with alcohol. Not to get pissed, but just that having a glass of wine or a beer would always just numb out distractions or aid with having a sense of proportion - usually if I’m on a rant, it’s stone cold sober, I’m naturally a lot more laid back just with that one beer that can take the edge off a mood or a sense of anxiety. Weird.
Anyway, the replacement is what I’m getting my head round - I think I still have the same predisposition to be argumentative, but while before I could sort of “switch” into a slightly less spiky version after I’d opened a bottle of wine, now I think I (mostly) can now notice when I’m getting into ADHD behaviour - whether it’s procrastinating or getting into a time sink - and usually make an executive decision to do something different.

Interested in whether any of the others who were looking into it got any further?

Stray observation - but a lot of behaviour in ADHDers is geared towards dopamine hits. Do you think there’s a buzz you get out of the arguments, or the nice red notifications that someone has quoted you? I think I do, to an extent. My brain is bored so a quick to and fro on here gives me a little kick - all subconsciously of course, I don’t come here thinking about that.

And perhaps alcohol fulfils the same thing. That little buzz a drink gives? Used to be putting a bet on for me but no longer.

Posted: **Fri Oct 27, 2023 11:39 pm**

Posted: **Sat Oct 28, 2023 12:56 am**

Rich Tea Wellin wrote: ↑Fri Oct 27, 2023 11:00 pm
Joe315 wrote: ↑Fri Oct 27, 2023 3:38 pm You really should go for a diagnosis. Had a mate who thought he had ADHD, 3 years later was found dead with a massive brain tumour. His wife kept telling him to go & stop self diagnosing. Good luck whatever you decide to do.
Wtf!?

Some form of cancerous tumour that presents as adhd. Normally in children but his was a slow burner. Few years ago now so can't fully remember all the details & haven't worked with his mrs for over a decade. pretty rare all the same. Hope that explains a bit better.

Posted: **Sat Oct 28, 2023 8:04 am**

You will be pleased to know that according to Lee 30p Anderson ADHD is all bollocks and just bad parenting.
https://inews.co.uk/news/lee-anderson-b ... ng-2666875

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