Next years Eurovision UK entry

[Long slender neck]

Sam Ryder your five minutes are up. Find him quite cringe really.

[RedDwarf 1881]

It's supposed to be non political, well you could have fooled me

Exactly . That's why I hate that show so much . In the old days it used to be a bit of fun with an equal chance of winning . Nowadays it's too politicised
and with the UK having no chance of winning . I reckon we only came second last year due to our support for Ukraine . Of course it was no surprise when Ukraine won with somebody resembling a singing curtain

Why do you care who wins a competition that you hate?

I don't care who wins .

[Dunners]

Sam Ryder also put a proper shift in when it came to PR. He toured everywhere on a full frontal charm offensive, so that he and Spaceman were reasonably well known across the rest of Europe before the competition.

The UK entry this year wasn't terrible. But it was not anyone's favourite either. If you're 13th or lower on everyone's list of favourites you're not going to get points.

Mae Muller never put in the effort Sam did. Her vocal wasn't strong enough, and the song was meh. So no conspiracy theories needed as the result was justified.

[Long slender neck]

Hannah's Waddinghams the real winner anyway

[Neptune's Spear]

As Nan would say "What a load of f#@%ing sh€t"

I didnt waste my time with it

[Max Fowler]

Sam Ryder also put a proper shift in when it came to PR. He toured everywhere on a full frontal charm offensive, so that he and Spaceman were reasonably well known across the rest of Europe before the competition.

The UK entry this year wasn't terrible. But it was not anyone's favourite either. If you're 13th or lower on everyone's list of favourites you're not going to get points.

Mae Muller never put in the effort Sam did. Her vocal wasn't strong enough, and the song was meh. So no conspiracy theories needed as the result was justified.

It's not a conspiracy to note that most of continental Europe do not like the English. And that will obviously have been reflected in the voting.

The song is a decent, catchy pop number, but her performance and delivery were very average but still shouldn't have been second from last. Not that I'm getting upset by the result, unlike some oddballs.

Probably not much surprise to hear my top songs were Belgium's disco-house number, Croatia's lefty punks, Moldova with their pschedelic woodland creatures and Germanys rock gods. Israel's little pop princess was the stand out performer, though.

Wonder if matey is still around who logs on everytime someone types the word Israel? He's going to be disappointed to read this.

[Dunners]

It's not a conspiracy to note that most of continental Europe do not like the English. And that will obviously have been reflected in the voting.

How true is this though?

Are the kind of people who would vote in Eurovision really likely to be swayed by perceived nationalistic tendencies? And, if so, why did so many of them vote for Sam Ryder last year?

I've travelled all over Europe and I've never detected any anti-English sentiment. That may be because I just win people over with my warm personality of course.

[CEB]

My assumption has always been that the UK adopts a knowing kitsch at Eurovision, which maybe feels like a piss take to the countries where their contributions are earnest (though usually self aware) so the UK’s usual failure is more because we treat it as a joke and the voters don’t like that, than solely down to any anti UK sentiment

[Max Fowler]

It's not a conspiracy to note that most of continental Europe do not like the English. And that will obviously have been reflected in the voting.

That may be because I just win people over with my warm personality of course.

You and Sam Ryder, both.

[Rich Tea Wellin]

25th out of 26, wow, just a few points better than Germany, and they had better songs whilst marching through Poland.

Nobhead comment, unsurprisingly for you

[Chicken Dhansak]

25th out of 26, wow, just a few points better than Germany, and they had better songs whilst marching through Poland.

Nobhead comment, unsurprisingly for you

Why, what's upset you so much then, jerk off?

[Rich Tea Wellin]

25th out of 26, wow, just a few points better than Germany, and they had better songs whilst marching through Poland.

Nobhead comment, unsurprisingly for you

Why, what's upset you so much then, jerk off?

Reported

[Frogger]

Nobhead comment, unsurprisingly for you

Why, what's upset you so much then, jerk off?

Reported

Not condoning the comment, it wasn’t that funny, but you did start it by calling him a nobhead TBH that was a lot funnier than the initial comment.

[Dunners]

The answer is Cliff Richard

I think he's just ruled himself out.

[Daily Express bot]

If you had Adele or Ed Sheeran up there representing us we would still come last as the rest of Europe hate us and that was before we stopped giving them billions, it is just the way it is. Imagine if Farage brought out a song and represented the UK? The Clapometer would explode!

[The Mindsweep]

After todays news, it has to be Lad Baby

[Daily Express bot]

The answer is Cliff Richard

I think he's just ruled himself out.

Obviously losing the plot. When I accidentally listen to any of his stuff it seems his appeal has always been for the blue rinse brigade.