Things That Make You Go Hmmmmmm

[Thor]

If the Police arrest a mime artist, do they tell him that he has the right to remain silent?

[F*ck The Poor & Fat]

Of course, but when a tightrope walker goes on trial his future is in the balance.

[Thor]

How do “Do not walk on the grass” signs get there?

[Forty-Niner]

Sign in Seven Sisters Road, "Shattered Windscreens Replaced". If you've got one shattered windscreen why would you want another?

[Howling Mad Murdock]

Keys Cut while you wait ...Didn't like that one at all.

[Lucky7]

What if the Hokey Pokey IS what its all about?

[Real Al]

Why is there only one Monopolies Commission?

[Thor]

How does a thermos flask know if the contents are hot or cold?

[HARVEY T DENTON]

I was at the crib, sittin' by the fireplace
Drinkin' cocoa on the bear skin rug
The door bell rang, who could it be?
Thought to myself then started to shrug
Got to the door, ding dong, who is it?
My girl's best friend had payed me a visit
Sly as can be tight dress and all
She knew that I was faithful, I really didn't have the gall
I tried to chill, she made the move
Now, I know my girlfriend wouldn't approve
I didn't realize my girl was settin' me up
Yo, my girlfriend didn't trust me, no
Yeah, but she lost control, I wouldn't take the bait
I said, "Chill baby, baby chill baby, baby wait"
My girl bust in, caught us creatin' a boom
She said, "Girlfriend"?

[A Pedant]

Why is there only one Monopolies Commission?

Hasn't existed for 20 years.

[SalfordO]

Why is there only one Monopolies Commission?

There isn't any Monopolies Commission now

[Forty-Niner]

Take one pill four times a day.

[Mikero]

Safety glasses must be worn, why not have new ones?

Mikero

[Thor]

If a word in the dictionary is misspelled how would we know?